| Live |
[Jun. 2nd, 2008|04:56 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | indifferent | ] |
What is life if not lonely? Ironic how we are surrounded by people each and everyday and still we feel the loneliness? You could walk by the same person constantly without ever realizing they are your perfect match. Life is fickle and confusing for those who cannot comprehend its meaning. It has been asked many times. What is the meaning of life? The answer is simple for those who see without eyes unclouded. Why were we born at all you may ask? We live to find our own meanings of life. There is not one person the same as another so why should there be only one answer for multiple variables? People are all unique and find different purposes for why they live. So the meaning of life is simple; to live the way you want to. If you keep pondering for endless years why you were put on this earth then you have wasted the gift that was bestowed upon you. You don’t need a reason for everything in life for everything cannot be explained. For example, do you need a reason to love the person you care most about? Or do you just love them regardless? Love is like life. Love also has no meaning and throws reason and probability into the ever blowing wind. You do not need a reason to love for you just do. And you do not need a reason to live you just are. That is the secret of life. Living while you can and making the most of the time you have on this beautiful earth. |
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| Ugh |
[May. 14th, 2008|03:19 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | infuriated | ] |
have you ever had one of those days??
where just have the urge to KILL SOMETHING!!!!!!
yea...thats my mood right about now
good thing i'm alone huh?
anyways
i am trying to break up with my boyfriend who i've been with
for three years now...
i say trying cuz....its not going well
HE WON'T LET ME GOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
and he's not getting the hint that i don't want to be with him
soooo...i kinda snapped
and told him i hate him
he didn't like that too much
i made him cry ><
gawd
life sucks majorly
so now i'm trying to be a total bitch to him
so then maybe he'll hate me
and not be so depressed
he scared me half to death when he drove me home tho...
i thought he was going to purposefully drive off the road
and then hit a tree
no more driving with him!!!!!!
i feel horrible about it too..
hurting him like this is killing me but
i have to do it
i don't love him anymore
and thats just how things work out sometimes
by the way...
the person who created ice cream was a genius
best comfort food EVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! |
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[Apr. 28th, 2008|04:30 pm] |
don't pretend
remove that mask
open your eyes and truely
see
through the guided
haze
fit in with yourself
the others
will
follow |
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| Myself....who was in a writing mood |
[Apr. 28th, 2008|04:20 pm] |
Pour it out
set it free
don't keep it inside any longer
don't be afraid, it can't get any worse
but what if no one cares?
it doesn't matter, i'm already lost...drowning
in hopelessness that doesn't exist
watching from above
as i fall below
pitying and disgraced
but its not true
i'm okay
but i'm not
make up your mind
i can't decide
should i do it?
let it free?
what have you got to lose?
only me |
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| VACATION!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! |
[Apr. 19th, 2008|08:23 am] |
i am soo excited right now!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
no school for a whole week
(jumps up and down)
of course my dad's house is a dead zone for my cell
and he doesn't have WiFi...
so ppl will be angry cuz i won't be able to return phone calls
hehehehe
otherwise!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i am happy
jus gonna hang out for the day...
watch old movies with my dad...and old western's too
which aren't pretty bad for most of em...just RLY predictable
lol
and we will prbly have to go shopping...
he keeps NO food in this house ><
but at least i can sugar and salt now!!
i live with my grandparents and my grampa ain't too healthy..
so we can't have any type of salt or sugar in the house...cuz he eats it
and we can't anything with alot of fat either cuz of mom
so basically i eat fat free low sodium sugar free no cholestorol stuff....
and most of it tastes like crap
and i have gotten soooo used to eating it
that now when i have a regular potato chip with salt on it...i immediatly need a glass of water...cuz i find it waaaayyyyyy to salty
LOL
but i'm eating healthy at least!!
well...healthier
^.^ |
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| RICKROLL!!! |
[Apr. 17th, 2008|09:57 pm] |
We're no strangers to love
you know the rules and so do I!!!
A full commitments what i'm thinking of
You wouldn't get this from any other guy
i just wanna tell you how i'm feeling
gotta make you understand,
Never gonna give you up
Never gonna let you down
Never gonna run around and hurt you
Never gonna make you cry
Never gonna say goodbye
Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you!
We've known eachother for so long
Your hearts been aching
but you're to shy to say it
Inside we both know what's been going on
We know the game and we're gonna play it!
And if you ask me how i'm feeling
don't tell me you're to blind to see....
hahaha yea i just HAD to do that
on account of the fact that its stuck in my head
and i'm listening to it right now^^ |
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| Crying |
[Apr. 17th, 2008|08:54 pm] |
its one of those nights...
were you can't stop the tears
you don't fully understand why you cry
but you can't help it
they just flow down
some say crying makes you feel better afterward
but for me
it makes it worse
because there is no afterwards
i keep crying
crying, crying, crying
hoping it will stop
but knowing it won't
not for a while
and even if the tears stop flowing
you'll still be crying on the inside
and wondering why
why am i always crying? |
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| (insert your random subject here) |
[Apr. 17th, 2008|02:38 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | my room | ] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | blah | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Waiting for the World to Fall | ] |
ahhh another glorious day of school completed...
YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!
i can't wait to go to college and leave my miserable high school
on the bright side i have april vacation all of next week!!
which means i shall be stayin up till about 3 am everynight
and waking up bright and early round noon
lol
the best part of all though will be that fact that i will have the house to myself!!!!
FINALLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i'm living with my dad for the week so i will be all alone...
gosh i haven't had the house to myself for more than 2 hours
in the past 7 years
i can't wait!!!
but of course knowing my dad he will wanna take me to work with him...
at least for some of the days
i love my dad and all..but i rly don't wanna have to get up early on my vacation time.
and hopefully i won't have to babysit my cousins either ><
i love them to death but they are brother and sister so they fight about
EVERYTHING!!!!
every little thing will set them off into a brawl!!!
drives me nuts!!!!
LOL
but i guess it would be cool to have a sibling...
even if all you did was fight and argue all the time
you should feel happy and lucky that you have siblings u rly should ^_^
i kind of have a sibling as well...
hes my half brother...my fathers son
he's about 12 years older than i am tho...
and he doesnn't want to have anyhthing to do with me seeing as how he hates my father even though he has never met my dad...yea its a long story
maybe one day i'll just gather my courage and knock on his door.
hopefully he won't hate me...
but he'll probably shut the door in my face as soon as he realizes who it is.
LOL |
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| Complain |
[Apr. 16th, 2008|09:47 pm] |
i mostly post these to complain
to, in some way, let out my feelings when no one is willin to listen
people don't usually like someone who complains too much..
i've found that out the hard way...
so instead i listen to other peoples problems
that way i make more friends...
and people like me more
so i'll just be here,
silently listening to you spill out your heart
while mine fades into the background...
bleeding and turning to dust
because i'm too afraid
to let all my feelings out like u do
and risk being scorned
so i'll just post my thoughts here out of the reach of everyone
and act like nothing is wrong...
so you don't think i'm to annoying...
and won't leave me behind |
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| Back |
[Apr. 16th, 2008|07:27 pm] |
so i am really bored right now...
and for once i am not writing this post during my english class
yay me!!!!
anyways today was my schools "Day of Silence" which is to support gay rights and what not. Of course i participated and i didn't talk for the whole day!!!!
which is amazing for me ^_^
and then i was talking a mile a minute when the day ended lol
but honestly i am just feeling really lonely right now
and i have nothing to do.....
(bangs head against desk)
haha i'm getting crazier by the second here!!
tralalala
is just one of those bad days....
you know the ones where you feel depressed no matter what you do?
thats what i am feeling...lots of sadness and loneliness
speaking of that i had to write a paper about all the things i "carry"
so basically i had to write my whole life story and how it defined me as a person.
my teacher told me to base it off the book "The Things They Carried"
which is a vietnam book and it is really depressing
so of course like i was told to do...i based it off that book...so it was sad.
and because of this my teacher now wants me to see her for she thinks i am
"depressed and in need of guidance".....
gawd i knew writing that paper was a bad idea...
i should have wrote about happy and inconsequential crap...
on the bright side ...i did get a 100% on it
YAY!!!! |
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| here i am again |
[Nov. 27th, 2007|02:11 pm] |
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i am yet again writing this during my English class. I am trying to brain storm ideas for my Grapes of Wrath paper and nothing is coming to mind. I am also upset right now because my favorite game DOMO is shut down for a week....AND I THINK CASHEL IS A GOOD PERSON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and also Frosty the Snowman needs to die because he is one crack and waaayyy too happy for his own good...yah i'm gonna kill him now...in fact i am going to stick Frosty in a tunnel and blow it up with him inside. hehehehe |
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| I Am Bored |
[Oct. 30th, 2007|02:16 pm] |
Hi, my name is bored and i am currently ready to shoot myself....(not literally!!). i am writing from my english class and the bell is going to ring in exactly 2 seconds...and then i have to stay after school longer for chorus UGH!
i am starving because i missed lunch so that i could finish a project that is stil not working right...and life just keeps moving and running me over. |
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